Hudson was an exceptional baby. Within his first 12 months of life, he had surpassed every physical milestone months ahead of what was considered “typical”. He was a healthy, thriving young boy. He babbled appropriately, said “Dada” often, and had phrases like “what’s this?” and “what’s that?” At around a year old things changed for Hudson. He stopped wanting to make eye contact and connect with the people around him. Over the course of the next few months, the few words and expressions he did have left him…until he fell completely silent.

At that point, we took immediate action and had Hudson in early intervention by 18 months. Although he began EI at an early age, he was not given a diagnosis of autism until he was about 3 years old. During that year and a half, we followed and listened to every word his doctors and therapists had to say. We ran from one specialist to another. At one point we even had ABR testing done (a sedated auditory brainstem response test) because his therapists were convinced he didn’t have autism and was “just deaf”. It was exhausting and confusing for all of us. We had internally accepted and knew Hudson was autistic from the very beginning but hearing professionals constantly express doubts or other reasoning was both emotionally and physically draining. We felt a sense of relief when he finally was given his official diagnosis.

There are many stages you will go through during the transition from “parent” to “autism parent”. There are layers of emotions and realizations you have to peel back. What we realized very quickly was that we didn’t want our son to have to change himself to fit in the square society expected and wanted him to. But we also knew he couldn’t keep going down the path he was taking either. We decided Hudson had to meet us in the middle, we would indulge his strengths and interests but he needed to work on his weaknesses in return.

He thrives in anything physical. Swimming, running, climbing, jumping, you name it, he’s mastered it. We joke (sort of) that he will one day be in the Olympics. He is the happiest, most affectionate boy. I am met with kisses and snuggles every morning. He finds joy in nearly everything and in every setting. A piece of paper could keep him occupied for an hour! He is his best self when being outside and exploring. He is proud of himself in these areas and likes when you acknowledge his strengths.

Being nonverbal, Hudson has become very in tune with how others are feeling around him. He picks up on everything. And this may be what I wish the outside world knew about him most. He wants you to talk to him, he wants you to acknowledge him, he wants you to try. Just because he may not have the tools to reciprocate appropriately doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the same feelings and wants as any other child. He knows when someone doesn’t want to deal with him and when someone is genuinely interested. Hudson may become very frustrated if he doesn’t feel understood. He may grab or scratch when he is excited or frustrated.

He tends to be self directed and lacks a sense of repercussions. He has triggers and things that send him spiraling, he will completely unravel to any “buzzing” noise. He is working on these things. He has gotten so much better on self regulating himself and identifying situations that may make him uncomfortable and removing himself from them.

These are his strengths and these are his weaknesses. These are the best parts of our boy and the biggest obstacles he has to overcome. He has come SO FAR, now at nearly 5 years old, from where he once was. We are so proud of him. We relish in the small moments of pure joy he gives us. He is such a happy kid. He has so many things he battles with daily. So many things that overstimulate him, tasks that take immense focus to complete, extreme efforts to participate in what most would consider “regular” everyday tasks. And still he has a smile on his face. He fights through and keeps it moving. He is a warrior. He is trying his best.

To learn more about Hudson, follow @theblockistot on Instagram!

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