Learn more about Sloan, an amazing warrior with a limb difference.
limb difference | lucky fin | lucky fin project | disability advocate | special needs | special needs family | special needs parenting | inclusion | inclusion matters
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The Universe knew that I would love her. That I would fight for her, advocate for her, and be everything she needed from a mother. I felt like my entire life had led up to this, had prepared me for this: to be Ivy’s mom. Maybe that’s why I’m such an empath. Maybe Ivy will need a mom who is empathetic, compassionate, and loving. Maybe that’s why I’ve advocated for others in the past— it was all practice for Ivy. But then things shifted again. And instead of thinking that Ivy needed me, I started to realize that I’m the one who needs her. She saw me and said “Yes. She needs me. She needs me to be her daughter.” It’s not Ivy who needs me. I need her because she completes me, completes my family, in ways I never realized. She’s a balm to my soul, a salve to past wounds. Ivy will teach me things I didn’t think I needed to know, or maybe didn’t want to know.
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My husband and I had been married for only nine short months before we found out that I was pregnant. We weren’t exactly “trying” for a baby, but we were both thrilled and nervous upon seeing the first positive pregnancy test! The first few months flew by, and despite the pregnancy handbooks and websites that warned of first trimester symptoms like morning sickness and food aversions, I didn’t experience a single symptom! In fact, physically, I felt great. At my first OB appointment, my doctor assured me that my baby’s heartbeat sounded normal, and the ultrasound technician sent us home with images of our perfect little bean. At that point, we were expecting a normal, smooth sailing pregnancy with a perfect little baby at the end of it. (Boy, were we in for a surprise!)
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Looking back at the day we went in for Joseph's ultrasound, I remember how quiet the room was and how the tech said, "The doctor will review and call you if needed." It felt odd, but in the moment we were excited to share the news that we were having a baby boy! A day later we found out about our right hand man. We shared the shocking news with close family and friends immediately but it took us a month to share with others. We did it by posting this picture and telling this story…
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We returned to the high risk office for the anomaly scan as planned. That morning, I once again felt an overwhelming sense that something was wrong. The tech that was doing our scan was as pleasant as could be and made no indications that anything looked abnormal. I was feeling relieved and hopeful that all looked good when we went in to discuss the scan with the OB. He looked my husband and I straight in the eye and said "Your baby looks great, healthy and thriving, but he appears to be missing part of his left arm. It seems to just taper off after the elbow." Wow. Talk about a gut punch. My mother's intuition had been right - there was something that wasn't quite right...but oh if only we knew then just how perfect Grayson would be, limb difference and all.
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